Would I Be A Channel

 

Would I be a channel,

Only a channel for Thee.

Content to set all glories aside

To simply be a vessel for Thee.

Soaking daily in Thy Word

Renewed each morning with Your smile

Resting my head upon Your chest

And waiting upon Your voice.

Setting all worldliness aside,

Sacrificed upon Your altar.

Content to wear the cross You bore

For my sin, it was that it was borne.

Would I be a channel,

A vessel exuding Thy light.

Seeking no honor for myself,

But only for You to be glorified.

A Lesson in Trust

Belle is my cow. After arriving at the farm as our family's first milk cow,  Belle gradually became my particular project and my special friend. That has been over 10 years now and although Belle is a dinosaur in cow years, she still holds such a special place in my heart and life. 

Belle is due to calve soon, any day in fact, and earlier this week I brought her alone to a new pen so I could watch over her more easily, where she had a clean place to calve and so for her to be near to milk when the time came. Belle had grown accustomed to being a part of the herd and the sudden change to solitude did not sit well with her. She expressed this dissatisfaction with regular bawls and she generally acts discontented. I was outside the other day paying her a quick visit and as I walked back to the house, I had a spiritual analogy. 

Belle was standing at the gate, wishing to be released from the "prison" I had placed her in. I attempted to console her with the truth that as soon as she calved she would have the company she desired and would become perfectly content with her situation. In short, after a time, she would understand why I had her in the position that I did. 

Belle and I in 2018

As I turned my steps back toward the house, I made the connection between the physical example before me and z spiritual truth. Right now, there are things in life that don't make sense to me, areas that I wish were different. We all have things like that, but what would the Lord like to say to us? "My daughter, this will all make sense in time, you will simply have to trust Me with today." One day, all the confusion will be made clear, and out of the painful stones placed in our lives will be made into a beautiful memorial unto the Lord's work in our life, Jesus Christ being the Cornerstone. 

So take courage, take hope. His way is perfect (Deuteronomy 32:4) and He has promised to work EVERYTHING for good in life, even our mistakes He uses for His glory (Romans 8:28).

Waiting

"Steadfastness, that is holding on;

Patience, that is holding back

Expectancy, that is holding the face up;

Obedience, that is holding one's self in readiness to go or do;

Listening, that is holding quiet and still so as to hear."

~S.D. Gordon "Quiet Talk on Prayer" 

Family Life - Fall 2022

Is this a rather late post? Yes, it is and although I offer no apology, the numerous pictures below may supply a sufficient reason. The last months of 2022 were full of steady activity and continued opportunities for grace. Christ continues to reign and may we only look to Him in Whom we live, and move and have our being (Acts 17:28).

So, here is a peek at the Smith family's fall season. 

Storing a few jars of saurkraut.

Although our family primarily purchases all our hay, we do a 
a relatively small amount of baleage. There is something nostalgic
about hay season and even though I am not  needed in the actual 
work itself, I still enjoy walking through the windrows and smelling
the sweet smell of fresh-cut hay.

We waved goodbye to Caden in September as he headed to 
Ambassador Bible College. Before he left, the 7 of us
children at home went out for ice cream. 

James celebrating 1 month!

While working for a local business at the Kentucky State Fair, 
I was able to spend some special time with my grandfather (my dad's father).
I am so grateful for those memories. 

We celebrated Grandma's (Mom's mother) 80th birthday with
a special dinner out!

Celebrating Leah's 14th birthday.

In September, I flew to Florida for a prison ministry trip.

Home again! Checking cows with Hope and Peaches.

I spent a weekend with Grandma. 

In late September, Emma, Stephen, and James came up to Kentucky
for a visit! It was the first time that most of the family had the opportunity 
to meet James. Here he is with Aunt Ella!

Although I had been present at James' birth, I was still eager 
to get in baby snuggles.

We went through a corn maze together while they were here. 

In late October, I was able to go over to North Carolina to spend several 
days with Emma and her family. As Caden was headed back in that direction
to college after fall break, I took advantage of the ride. I had a wonderful 
chauffeur and it was wonderful getting all that visiting time with him. 

Love the auntie and nephew time!

I made applesauce this fall and tried my hand at canning for the 
first time!

We surprised Olivia with a high school graduation party! We had 
a sweet time as a family celebrating Olivia, her life, and the 
the accomplishment of completing high school. 

Feeling His Pleasure

In the famous movie, "Chariots of Fire", Scottish runner and future missionary to China, Eric Liddel, takes the hand of his sister, who has voiced her fears that he has become too encumbered with running to give proper thought to the Lord's work, and he says,

"I believe God made me for a purpose, for China, but He also made me fast, and when I run I feel His pleasure. To give it up would be to hold Him in contempt. You were right, it's not just fun. To win is to honor Him."

I want to be able to "feel HIS pleasure" about every activity, every moment spent, every conversation held, every show of love offered, every secret thought, and every task undertaken. My heart's desire would be that I would do nothing that would cause His face to be turned away in shame of my choices, but that I would only feel the sunshine of His pleasure in my spirit. To "win" in the daily, minute tasks that are done for the cause of Christ, is to honor Him and we can delight in His pleasure shining upon us. 

God calls some to more overt ministries, to serve Him in the spotlight of other men, but for most of us, He offers us the ministry of serving Him in secret places. These daily ministrations, however, if done in the pursuit of the heart of our Lord, honor Him no differently. So let us go forth, anticipating the satisfaction of living in the light of His countenance and delighting in the opportunities to bring our Heavenly Father pleasure.  

"And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance for ye serve the Lord Christ." Colossians 3:23-24

"Only fear the Lord, and serve Him in truth with all your heart: for consider how great things He hath done for you." 1 Samuel 12:24

"Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord." 1 Corinthians 15:58

*I am not necessarily recommending the movie "Chariots of Fire". Unfortunately, as it covers more than the life of Eric Liddel, it includes some immodesty as well as irreverent language.  

He Can't Use It Until He Breaks It

I lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling, my heart emptied of the many tears that had poured forth earlier that day. I had been wounded like I had never been before and I was alone. In grief, I mentally looked at the pieces of the situation that now lay at my feet, shattered and scattered. 

              

                 I felt broken. 

                         I was broken. 

As I lay there, going over this trail of thought, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the story of the woman who broke her precious, expensive alabaster box of ointment to anoint Jesus. 

"After two days was the feast of the passover, and of unleavened bread...And being in Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as He sat at meat, there came a woman having an alabaster box of ointment of spikenard very precious; and she brake the box, and poured it on His head...And Jesus said, Let her alone; why trouble ye her? she hath wrought a good work on me." 

Mark 14:1,3,6  (KJV)

Then a whisper came to my aching heart that I have never forgotten: 

"I can't use it until I break it"

So simple and so true. The valuable box of ointment was useless living inside the sealed box, though I am sure it was a lovely box to look at, however, there was no practical purpose for it. There was a sweetness in the knowledge that the case held value and hope (It has been thought that the value of the box was to be the woman's dowery), but the ointment itself, held no purpose held out of sight in the canister. It was not until the box was broken and the ointment allowed to be poured out, that the real purpose for the precious spikenard was able to be accomplished. 

Laying there that night, what a comfort this was to my bleeding heart. There was purpose in this breaking and through it was going to bring forth fruit that would not have been borne had I stayed "inside the box". There was hope amid the pain; there is always hope! Again and again, in the scriptures, the Lord promises to heal the broken, bind up wounds, be close to the sorrowful, and comfort those that are hurting. 

"For He maketh sore, and bindeth up: He woundeth, and His hands make whole."

Job 5:18

"I have seen his ways, and will heal him: I will lead him also, and restore comforts unto him and to his mourners. I create the fruit of the lips; Peace, peace to him that is far off, and to him that is near, saith the Lord; and I will heal him."

Isaiah 57:18-19

"O Lord my God, I cried unto Thee, and Thou hast healed me."

Psalm 30:2

"He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds."

Psalm 147:3

"Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God." 

2 Corinthians 1:4

"As one whom his mother comforteth, so will I comfort you; and ye shall be comforted..."

Isaiah 66:13

"The Lord is night unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit." 

Psalm 34:18

"I, even I, am He that comforteth you..."

Isaiah 51:12a

"Come, let us return unto the Lord: for He hath torn, and He will heal us; He hath smitten, and He will bind us up."

Hosea 6:1

"The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed Me to preach good tidings unto the meek; He hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound...to comfort all that mourn..."

Isaiah 61:1, 2b

Over the last little while, the lines from a hymn have replayed themselves through my mind.

"All I have needed Thy hand hath provided-"

~Great Is Thy Faithfulnes~

What a sovereign Father we have! The pain has a purpose! It is good and it is beautiful in His sight. He has allowed it with intent and that intent is only for our good! Such a precious truth to rest upon. He has promised to use the heartache, the bleeding heart, and the broken piece. Each thread of grief is used to make the weaving of our life more complete, and Lord willing, to mold us more into the image of Christ Himself. 

            "The Weaver"            

by Grant Colfax Tuller

My life is but a weaving betwixt the Lord and me,

I do not choose the color-He worketh steadily.

Oftimes He weaveth sorrow and I in foolish pride,

Forget He sees the upper, and I the underside.

Not till the look is silent, and the shuttle cease to fly

Shall God unroll the canvas and explain the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful in the Weaver's skillful hand

As the threads of gold and silver in the pattern

He has planned.

The Arrival of Baby Seaford!

On July 22nd, we received the call from Emma in North Carolina that her contractions remained consistent (she had had prodromal labor for several days) and that we needed to make our way east. Mom and I gathered our things and got them and ourselves in the car and began the long trip, hoping we would make the birth. We would not have been worried if we had been able to look into the next few days!

We made good time on the road and arrived at Emma and Stephen's house safely, but unfortunately, the contractions were not as strong and consistent as we would have hoped for a more speedy delivery. We went to bed anticipating a trip to the birthing center in the middle of the night, but no call came.

Saturday morning found Emma still having contractions, but no significant progression. Emma and I took a walk to try to help labor progress and we spent the rest of the day and most of Sunday, watching movies, pressing pressure points, resting, keeping everyone fed, and applying (and diffusing) essential oils. 

Sunday night the contractions suddenly intensified and after calling a midwife, we were advised to head on to the birthing center. It wasn't quite as chaotic as the scene in "I Love Lucy" when Lucy goes to the hospital, but it was a close rival! =) Mom, Stephen, and I were flying around trying to gather water, keys, electrolytes, a baby carrier, purses, food, etc.

After arriving and getting checked in, the contractions had once again eased up and we began the night watch, continuing to press pressure points and helping Emma change positions to keep labor moving. 

After 4 hours, Emma had not progressed any further than when she had been checked in, and legally the birthing center could not keep her any longer. So after receiving a muscle relaxer, we headed home around 3am to try to get some rest. 

Did I eat ice cream for breakfast? Yes, I did.

Monday morning, after just a few hours of sleep, we began the circuit again. Birthing ball and a movie, essential oils, and another walk. 

I kept the laundry moving. Routine is a good thing in stressful times. 

Around 11:30, Emma and Stephen headed back to the birthing center followed by Mom and me about an hour later. She had progressed further than the night before and was officially admitted into the center. 

"Fueling" for the night ahead at Dunkin!

At 11:22pm after many prayers, tears, perseverance from Emma, and the intervention of the Lord, James Elliot Seaford entered the world!

We watched God work so mightily on our behalf! Birth is such a miracle and I would not have missed being there for a great deal! 

Mom with her first grandchild!

Getting his first bath.

Skyping with the siblings at home.